Comments on: Preventing the Adult Aspie Meltdown http://www.aspieteacher.com/2009/02/preventing-the-adult-aspie-meltdown/ Thu, 29 Jul 2010 20:05:39 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.0 By: judy http://www.aspieteacher.com/2009/02/preventing-the-adult-aspie-meltdown/#comment-882 judy Sat, 05 Jun 2010 17:47:21 +0000 http://www.aspieteacher.com/?p=259#comment-882 I don't know...Loud places or busy resteraunts don't worry me or overwelm me as such. It's only when people's brats (word may sound strong and offensive but it illistrates my point) are bawling right near me. Sometimes I get irritated when I'm in people's way where ever I stand. If somebody tries squeezing past where I'm standing or says ''excuse me, please'' or ''mind your back'', I feel like lashing out and yelling sarcastically, ''will I be in your way if I go and stand in a big field?!'' I don’t know…Loud places or busy resteraunts don’t worry me or overwelm me as such. It’s only when people’s brats (word may sound strong and offensive but it illistrates my point) are bawling right near me. Sometimes I get irritated when I’m in people’s way where ever I stand. If somebody tries squeezing past where I’m standing or says ”excuse me, please” or ”mind your back”, I feel like lashing out and yelling sarcastically, ”will I be in your way if I go and stand in a big field?!”

]]> By: Justin http://www.aspieteacher.com/2009/02/preventing-the-adult-aspie-meltdown/#comment-861 Justin Mon, 31 May 2010 05:14:13 +0000 http://www.aspieteacher.com/?p=259#comment-861 I suspect that I might be an Aspie. I'm seeking a formal diagnosis, but that's not relevant to this particular topic. I get irritable and often lose my temper at the grocery store. My wife can't understand it. I try to explain the situation to her...I can't stand the chaos, I constantly want to remind people to think three-dimensionally, I get frustrated when someone pushes their cart on the incorrect side of the aisle creating unnecessary cart-jams. We deliberately shop early in the morning or late at night in order to avoid crowds. I have similar issues at movie theaters. It feels as if everyone's IQ plummets once they become part of a large group and inefficiency blossoms. I often feel like I'm the only one who notices it. I've read about Aspies and sensory overload before, but I've never heard a specific description of why the senses are overloaded. Does my experience sound typical or atypical of an Aspie experiencing over-stimulation? I suspect that I might be an Aspie. I’m seeking a formal diagnosis, but that’s not relevant to this particular topic.

I get irritable and often lose my temper at the grocery store. My wife can’t understand it. I try to explain the situation to her…I can’t stand the chaos, I constantly want to remind people to think three-dimensionally, I get frustrated when someone pushes their cart on the incorrect side of the aisle creating unnecessary cart-jams. We deliberately shop early in the morning or late at night in order to avoid crowds.

I have similar issues at movie theaters. It feels as if everyone’s IQ plummets once they become part of a large group and inefficiency blossoms. I often feel like I’m the only one who notices it.

I’ve read about Aspies and sensory overload before, but I’ve never heard a specific description of why the senses are overloaded. Does my experience sound typical or atypical of an Aspie experiencing over-stimulation?

]]> By: Rylee http://www.aspieteacher.com/2009/02/preventing-the-adult-aspie-meltdown/#comment-500 Rylee Wed, 11 Nov 2009 22:58:32 +0000 http://www.aspieteacher.com/?p=259#comment-500 That's not to say that's the exception among male psychologists, or that females are never insensitive or incompetent. I have found it rare to find a male psych who was as sensitive as he is. That’s not to say that’s the exception among male psychologists, or that females are never insensitive or incompetent. I have found it rare to find a male psych who was as sensitive as he is.

]]> By: Rylee http://www.aspieteacher.com/2009/02/preventing-the-adult-aspie-meltdown/#comment-499 Rylee Wed, 11 Nov 2009 22:56:30 +0000 http://www.aspieteacher.com/?p=259#comment-499 I can relate to so much of what you've said! I can't go to stores at Christmas time, i just get so confused that i'm in danger of sitting down and crying... I'm glad you are able to understand your daughter and hold her; my mom would just stand there and look at me, confused (she believes now that she's on the spectrum too) and i didn't do much differently with my son, i'm afraid (and sad) to say. I also do the fingernail stim. I have double-jointed fingers, and i will pull my pinkie finger over underneath my other fingers and squeeze the fingernail between first finger and thumb. I also bounce my foot under the table if i'm sitting. I only rock when i'm alone, mostly. I grind my teeth, have done since as long as i can remember. I have a pic my dad took when i was two where i'm standing there looking at him grinding away, with a big grin, too! Little did anyone know what damage that would cause. I would say, find a clinical psychologist who is knowledgeable about spectrum issues, or willing to work on learning along the way. Find one who is sensitive to women's issues, as well. I found mine through a friend who used to work at Women At Risk, and women's support groups can be a good place to start looking! My psychologist is a man, but he's very sensitive and supportive. I can relate to so much of what you’ve said! I can’t go to stores at Christmas time, i just get so confused that i’m in danger of sitting down and crying…
I’m glad you are able to understand your daughter and hold her; my mom would just stand there and look at me, confused (she believes now that she’s on the spectrum too) and i didn’t do much differently with my son, i’m afraid (and sad) to say.
I also do the fingernail stim. I have double-jointed fingers, and i will pull my pinkie finger over underneath my other fingers and squeeze the fingernail between first finger and thumb. I also bounce my foot under the table if i’m sitting. I only rock when i’m alone, mostly. I grind my teeth, have done since as long as i can remember. I have a pic my dad took when i was two where i’m standing there looking at him grinding away, with a big grin, too! Little did anyone know what damage that would cause.
I would say, find a clinical psychologist who is knowledgeable about spectrum issues, or willing to work on learning along the way. Find one who is sensitive to women’s issues, as well. I found mine through a friend who used to work at Women At Risk, and women’s support groups can be a good place to start looking! My psychologist is a man, but he’s very sensitive and supportive.

]]> By: Michelle http://www.aspieteacher.com/2009/02/preventing-the-adult-aspie-meltdown/#comment-498 Michelle Wed, 11 Nov 2009 13:57:11 +0000 http://www.aspieteacher.com/?p=259#comment-498 I'd like to know how an adult female can get a diagnosis of Asperger's...From everything I've read I would say I have it...but everyone around me says I act normal. Did I learn enough to just fool everyone? Christmas time is coming and the crowds in stores this time of year with music blaring is usually too much for me. I go in, get what I want and leave. But I am still super stressed. I'm also finding it hard to live in my apartment...noisy neighbors are driving me crazy. I also usually 'tune out' when super stressed and miss conversations. One of my 'stims' is rubbing my fingernail between two fingers on my other hand. No one seems to notice. I also want to add that having a child has been ALOT harder than I thought...esp since I think she is an aspie too. But at least I understand when she says something is too loud and I know not to punish her for meltdowns in the store (holding her usually is the best thing for those) I'm sorry if I rambled on too much. It is nice to meet all of you and hear your stories. I’d like to know how an adult female can get a diagnosis of Asperger’s…From everything I’ve read I would say I have it…but everyone around me says I act normal. Did I learn enough to just fool everyone?
Christmas time is coming and the crowds in stores this time of year with music blaring is usually too much for me. I go in, get what I want and leave. But I am still super stressed.
I’m also finding it hard to live in my apartment…noisy neighbors are driving me crazy.
I also usually ‘tune out’ when super stressed and miss conversations. One of my ‘stims’ is rubbing my fingernail between two fingers on my other hand. No one seems to notice.
I also want to add that having a child has been ALOT harder than I thought…esp since I think she is an aspie too. But at least I understand when she says something is too loud and I know not to punish her for meltdowns in the store (holding her usually is the best thing for those)
I’m sorry if I rambled on too much. It is nice to meet all of you and hear your stories.

]]> By: teri http://www.aspieteacher.com/2009/02/preventing-the-adult-aspie-meltdown/#comment-495 teri Tue, 10 Nov 2009 19:40:57 +0000 http://www.aspieteacher.com/?p=259#comment-495 I am glad I found your blog. I have a 25 yo aspie son. I have found it difficult to find all of the help we need. Would you share about how you deal with situations that dreg up old emotions, such as facing someone who has hurt you in the past. We had a confrontation with a hateful neighbor that nearly landed him in jail because he went off on her. He has never lashed out at anyone physically but he does verbally. Any suggestions? I am glad I found your blog. I have a 25 yo aspie son. I have found it difficult to find all of the help we need. Would you share about how you deal with situations that dreg up old emotions, such as facing someone who has hurt you in the past. We had a confrontation with a hateful neighbor that nearly landed him in jail because he went off on her. He has never lashed out at anyone physically but he does verbally. Any suggestions?

]]> By: Rylee http://www.aspieteacher.com/2009/02/preventing-the-adult-aspie-meltdown/#comment-408 Rylee Thu, 27 Aug 2009 06:45:22 +0000 http://www.aspieteacher.com/?p=259#comment-408 I still have meltdowns, and those that are just from overstimulation of the auditory kind, I can handle just by engaging in everyday kinds of stims, like twisting my feet and/or hands where it's relatively inconspicuous. My big problem in life is that if emotionally overstimulated, I can have meltdowns that I can't control, in public, which may involve weeping and shaking, flapping, etc. Of course it's not often that I find myself being emotionally overstimulated in public, fortunately, but sometimes it can be the memory of something current in my life which is intrusive enough to follow me out into the world so to speak. I still have meltdowns, and those that are just from overstimulation of the auditory kind, I can handle just by engaging in everyday kinds of stims, like twisting my feet and/or hands where it’s relatively inconspicuous. My big problem in life is that if emotionally overstimulated, I can have meltdowns that I can’t control, in public, which may involve weeping and shaking, flapping, etc. Of course it’s not often that I find myself being emotionally overstimulated in public, fortunately, but sometimes it can be the memory of something current in my life which is intrusive enough to follow me out into the world so to speak.

]]> By: cufflinks http://www.aspieteacher.com/2009/02/preventing-the-adult-aspie-meltdown/#comment-404 cufflinks Wed, 26 Aug 2009 22:20:22 +0000 http://www.aspieteacher.com/?p=259#comment-404 I agree that if you're a man, you're allowed to "space out". But when you're a woman you're kind of allowed to get uptight and throw a bitch fit. You can always blame your period. When I get overstimulated I turn into Norma Desmond and it looks a little freaky coming from a 6'3", broad shouldered man. I agree that if you’re a man, you’re allowed to “space out”. But when you’re a woman you’re kind of allowed to get uptight and throw a bitch fit. You can always blame your period. When I get overstimulated I turn into Norma Desmond and it looks a little freaky coming from a 6’3″, broad shouldered man.

]]> By: Dave http://www.aspieteacher.com/2009/02/preventing-the-adult-aspie-meltdown/#comment-389 Dave Sun, 23 Aug 2009 00:02:49 +0000 http://www.aspieteacher.com/?p=259#comment-389 Break the social conventions! Alright, yes, I am a male, so maybe this is an easy subject for me to approach. I also admit that I've accepted that I'm human, or at least that I share many of the same physical characteristics of those other humans that I see around me. But I also like to think that I'm not human, that I am from another planet, in a metaphorical sense. I'm not an aspie (nor an NT, if you will - I like to think of myself as an NF: neurofunky), but I can relate to some of the social impediments that I read about. I love staring off in to space in public, and I think everyone - no matter the gender - should be able to enjoy doing so in peace, no matter the circumstances! Break the social conventions! Alright, yes, I am a male, so maybe this is an easy subject for me to approach. I also admit that I’ve accepted that I’m human, or at least that I share many of the same physical characteristics of those other humans that I see around me. But I also like to think that I’m not human, that I am from another planet, in a metaphorical sense. I’m not an aspie (nor an NT, if you will – I like to think of myself as an NF: neurofunky), but I can relate to some of the social impediments that I read about. I love staring off in to space in public, and I think everyone – no matter the gender – should be able to enjoy doing so in peace, no matter the circumstances!

]]> By: Saja http://www.aspieteacher.com/2009/02/preventing-the-adult-aspie-meltdown/#comment-364 Saja Wed, 12 Aug 2009 07:22:10 +0000 http://www.aspieteacher.com/?p=259#comment-364 Another tip: earplugs. I recently got some that are supposed to let conversation through but dim everything above 80 dB, and they work wonderfully. (Don't want to be a walking advertisement for them here; I reviewed them on my blog if anyone's interested.) I've tried the plugs in several situations now, including stores and a party, and they're great. All the physically painful sounds, plus all the irritation-inducing ones, get muffled to a level that works for me, and I can follow conversation as well as I ever could. I've noticed that my stress level during and after a noisy event is much lower when I've worn the plugs. Another tip: earplugs. I recently got some that are supposed to let conversation through but dim everything above 80 dB, and they work wonderfully. (Don’t want to be a walking advertisement for them here; I reviewed them on my blog if anyone’s interested.)

I’ve tried the plugs in several situations now, including stores and a party, and they’re great. All the physically painful sounds, plus all the irritation-inducing ones, get muffled to a level that works for me, and I can follow conversation as well as I ever could. I’ve noticed that my stress level during and after a noisy event is much lower when I’ve worn the plugs.

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