Logan: Professional Lunching

It’s easy to know what to talk about in a meeting. Meetings have agendas and they have structure, and god willing, there is someone other than you leading them.

Lunches are not so easy. There’s little structure after you’re asked what you’d like to eat, and depending on who’s with you, a career-poisoning move may very well be possible. When you’re with new people, everything is scrutinized, from your choice of food to the way you take your seat, and worst of all is the topic of conversation. Discussing the wrong thing can get you in trouble with the boss, it can kill a sale, maybe even get you fired.

Sometimes it might seem better to eat in silence.  However, that’s usually a bad idea.

With coworkers: Lunch discussion can be an unloading point for stress of the day, or a time to talk about the weekend, kids, significant others, etc… this is an important counterpoint to a stressful working day that I find keeps my sanity in place, and helps develop the bond between coworkers. There’s nothing worse than to hate your coworkers, as I spend more time with them than my family and friends.

With the boss:  Lunch can be a great time to informally discuss the challenges you face in your daily work, if he or she is up for the topic. This helps impress upon your boss the value that you add to the organization, and can give your boss insight into better management of the group’s resources. Your boss can also give you a bit of insight into the challenges they face as a manager. I know that my boss does a lot of budget things, and so I attempt to do my job as efficiently as possible both in terms of time and money. Building this kind of working rapport with your boss is essential. Who knows, you might even stay friends after you stop being their direct report.

Senior management: Technical conversation should be kept to a minimum, but still have a presence to impress upon them your competence. I try to focus on learning as much as I can about the organizational goals. That makes me look good for caring about more than just my daily life, and allows them to do most of the talking, saving me from dangerous over-exposure. Impressing them with my technical ability without overwhelming them with technical details is also important, because senior management is prone to bypass normal support venues and go straight to the person they think is most qualified, increasing my face time with them and creating a better professional atmosphere for myself.

People from other organizations: Comparatively easy to deal with, especially in my situation. Most of the professionals from other organizations that I get the chance to sit down with are ether sales representatives or project teams. Both are interested in impressing me, not the other way around. Other organizations LOVE to be allowed to sell themselves to you, and if you let them talk long enough, they might pay for lunch! You may also wish to remember that the majority of people you meet from other organizations will be working in your career area, so you may wish to sell yourself to them as well. Knowing people is a powerful tool in a job search, especially in this economy.

Ultimately, a successful business lunch is an important and delicious part of your day. Done right, you can make and reinforce connections that will make life as a professional exponentially easier and more enjoyable. The best part is that the chance comes every day.

Logan posts on Mondays about Aspergers and the workplace.  Catch up on his previous columns here.