Subscribe Via RSSPerseveration and the Broken Record
Perseveration usually refers to behavior such as lining up toys, repeating words or phrases, or obsessing about a special interest.
Perseveration can also happen with emotions. When I’m trying to explain to my husband something that’s frustrating me, my brain can get stuck in an endless loop, like a broken record. And when that happens, the same emotions and words just get played over and over.
How To Recognize It
It’s hard for a person to realize that they’re prone to perseverating and when they’re in the middle of doing it.
Perseverating makes you feel you’re trapped in your emotions, and they go on and on because no one else understands you enough to resolve the situation. Or you’ll think the situation is sort of resolved and then a few minutes later everything comes rushing back and you’re saying the same things all over again.
Make It Stop!
Instead of waiting endlessly for the loop to stop, I sometimes try going outside to help me reset. I used to do this without knowing why – I’d just run off to the bookstore. Now I understand that I need a change of scenery because my brain needs a new set of inputs to process in order to stop cycling that loop.
For you the solution might be exercise, playing a game, or doing art. Whatever it is, you should choose something that won’t allow you to dwell on the situation you left behind. Venting online is kind of like winning a battle but losing the war – you may feel a temporary boost from the sympathy you get, but it won’t help you stop perseverating.
I’d also suggest having a talk with your partner, roommate, or family beforehand if you need to “disappear” or stop talking during a conflict, so they can understand your motives.
9 Responses
This is a HUGE problem for me and probably the major cause of people thinking I am nuts. If something is UNFAIR or UNREASONABLE or if someone just does something plain MEAN, I go off and can’t stop. If it is a big enough violation or betrayal, any time someone else brings it up, I start all over again, even years later.
I know my inability to let go of it is irrational but honestly, on a mental level, I am seeking resolution or at least some logic that never comes.
“Why?” is a question that I can never let go off but to be fair to myself, it almost never gets answered, either.
@e: Oh, gah, yes, I also get very perseverative about events that strike me as being unjust, to the point where I obsess over those events and don’t get anything else done. It’s so frustrating!
Unwanted perseveration can also be a big component of depression and dysthymia. I think that the clinical models for response to and treatment of depression and dysthymia in folks on the autism spectrum need to be different than what they are for nonautistic folks (or for that matter even than what they are for people with OCD, which I think is a different kettle of fish than autistic perseveration), and that the mechanisms of autistic perseveration (both wanted and unwanted, both good and bad) constitute one of the factors that need to be taken into account to that end — whether the modality that works best for the client is medication, cognitive talking therapy, some combination of the two, or anything else.
Phil, it would be nice to get treatment for ANY troubling aspect of ASD. As bothersome as perseveration is, it is not even close to the most bothersome symptom.
There are scores and scores of adults with undiagnosed ASD. When will the powers that be do something to help them?
I hadn’t really thought about this before this post came up on the hub, but yes, Phil, I totally agree. I had never really considered that part of my continuing struggles with dysthemia/mild depression are because of perseveration, but it’s absolutely related now that I can put the two together mentally. I’ll bring this up with my therapist; I think she’ll find it helpful (she seems interested in learning more about the spectrum and happy to do so if it helps me).
When I’m upset, I definitely tend towards perseverating on the cause, which is rarely helpful and often does more harm than good. Even if the cause of the original upset doesn’t end up being the focus of my perseveration, the fact that I’m upset often does! So I end up focusing and refocusing on being upset to the point that I lose track of why I was upset in the first place–it doesn’t matter, I just AM, and it becomes impossible to fix because there’s no longer any reason to it. Distracting is the only cure. I’m glad AspieTeacher brought this up for what it is: hopefully knowing what I’m doing will help me stop.
I’ve never been able to figure out how to express this before. Thanks for this post!
I am a neurotypical but suffer from this when my depression gets bad .I’ve always described it as like a tape playing in my head of hurts or upsets that won’t stop and I can’t switch it of .continuing to watch it makes everything worse but I can’t stop myself !
This is a very useful post Sandi, I’m always looking for ways of helping students with asd in school and will add this to my list
I just put the crucial conversation book on my amazon list that you have on sidebar under current reading. This is so perfect for a post I have the title – Having A Conversation – just need to type out my thoughts and this would tie in great with it.
I am also working on perseveration with my 14 yr old son Nick. Good tips, thanks
I do this so often, my N3S does too. It makes me feel incredibly anxious and usually hits me by mid afternoon at work. I cry in the toilets on a regular basis. I figure that agnst is less stressful than not being able to earn enough money to pay my bills. I would be much happier if I could work form home though.