Comments on: When You Misunderstand and Don’t Know It http://www.aspieteacher.com/2010/04/when-you-misunderstand/ Mon, 02 Jan 2012 17:30:25 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3 By: Abacaxi Mamao http://www.aspieteacher.com/2010/04/when-you-misunderstand/#comment-1254 Abacaxi Mamao Sun, 29 Aug 2010 21:28:30 +0000 http://www.aspieteacher.com/?p=2270#comment-1254 Do you have any advice for those of us who are in relationships with people who misunderstand and don't realize it? I assume that when I say something, and the other person appears to agree, that they've agreed to what I've actually said. In fact, at times, this person is often agreeing to something from inside his head. It is frustrating to me. Is there an alternative to asking him to repeat what he's just agreed to? I mean, that seems kind of condescending/infantilizing. Do you have any advice for those of us who are in relationships with people who misunderstand and don’t realize it? I assume that when I say something, and the other person appears to agree, that they’ve agreed to what I’ve actually said. In fact, at times, this person is often agreeing to something from inside his head. It is frustrating to me. Is there an alternative to asking him to repeat what he’s just agreed to? I mean, that seems kind of condescending/infantilizing.

]]> By: e aucoin http://www.aspieteacher.com/2010/04/when-you-misunderstand/#comment-775 e aucoin Thu, 15 Apr 2010 02:12:36 +0000 http://www.aspieteacher.com/?p=2270#comment-775 This is one of the most difficult things to explain to people, but I find it isn't just my hearing that works "funny." I can't tell you how many times when I was a kid I packed an assignment into my bookbag, sorted pages for a paper, or packed specific books for specific classes, only to find at school that I had all the wrong things, pages missing or in the wrong order, even when I was aware of the problem and had tried to pay special attention to what I was doing. It felt like a form of insanity and was always interpreted as carelessness. This is one of the most difficult things to explain to people, but I find it isn’t just my hearing that works “funny.” I can’t tell you how many times when I was a kid I packed an assignment into my bookbag, sorted pages for a paper, or packed specific books for specific classes, only to find at school that I had all the wrong things, pages missing or in the wrong order, even when I was aware of the problem and had tried to pay special attention to what I was doing. It felt like a form of insanity and was always interpreted as carelessness.

]]> By: Rachel Cohen-Rottenberg http://www.aspieteacher.com/2010/04/when-you-misunderstand/#comment-765 Rachel Cohen-Rottenberg Wed, 07 Apr 2010 20:04:55 +0000 http://www.aspieteacher.com/?p=2270#comment-765 Perhaps I'm fortunate in that I tend to react very quickly to what I hear if it sounds alarming, so I get corrected very quickly if I've heard it wrong. I also mishear things that are trivial but embarrassing, and when that happens, I scramble wildly for the Undo button--but of course, life doesn't come with one. Dammit. To overcompensate, I suppose, I tend to listen very carefully to what my husband says. Unfortunately, I then try to hold him to Every Single Word that falls from his lips until he reminds me that it's really, really, really okay for him to have mis-stated his intent or changed his mind. Perhaps I’m fortunate in that I tend to react very quickly to what I hear if it sounds alarming, so I get corrected very quickly if I’ve heard it wrong. I also mishear things that are trivial but embarrassing, and when that happens, I scramble wildly for the Undo button–but of course, life doesn’t come with one. Dammit.

To overcompensate, I suppose, I tend to listen very carefully to what my husband says. Unfortunately, I then try to hold him to Every Single Word that falls from his lips until he reminds me that it’s really, really, really okay for him to have mis-stated his intent or changed his mind.

]]> By: Heather http://www.aspieteacher.com/2010/04/when-you-misunderstand/#comment-759 Heather Mon, 05 Apr 2010 23:43:27 +0000 http://www.aspieteacher.com/?p=2270#comment-759 This was very insightful. Thank you for explaining with clear examples. This was very insightful. Thank you for explaining with clear examples.

]]> By: Savannah Nicole Logsdon-Breakstone http://www.aspieteacher.com/2010/04/when-you-misunderstand/#comment-758 Savannah Nicole Logsdon-Breakstone Mon, 05 Apr 2010 23:01:07 +0000 http://www.aspieteacher.com/?p=2270#comment-758 Most embarrassing time this happened to me, I heard "How old are You?" which, considering the environment (an SCA/medieval event, atthis one party invites and/or "liaisons" are pretty regular) was fairly reasonable if a bit odd from a server. Turned out he actually asked about what my order was. I avoided that vendor's booth for the rest of the event that year. ON a more regular and distressing note, I mishear things a lot that count. Like hearing "shut off notice" twice instead of, apparently, shut off notice being mentioned in one sentence and mishearing "send the form in" as "shut off notice in" in another. *headdesk* Most embarrassing time this happened to me, I heard “How old are You?” which, considering the environment (an SCA/medieval event, atthis one party invites and/or “liaisons” are pretty regular) was fairly reasonable if a bit odd from a server. Turned out he actually asked about what my order was. I avoided that vendor’s booth for the rest of the event that year.

ON a more regular and distressing note, I mishear things a lot that count. Like hearing “shut off notice” twice instead of, apparently, shut off notice being mentioned in one sentence and mishearing “send the form in” as “shut off notice in” in another. *headdesk*

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